Stop making questions. Start using exclamations!
Like any other 27-year old these days, I would wake up questioning my purpose in life, comparing my existence to other people my age and knowing that it is never a good thing to compare, yet still, such thoughts would linger-begging for attention.
It’s in the way you face change and stand up in the midst of it as if it’s not bothering you one single bit. I’m not too happy when I write something just for the sake of it. My soul needs to pour more into the well to feed my thirst. I don’t just want to talk about my recent trip nor the interesting things I’ve done lately. I want to inspire you to inspire myself.
To whoever is reading my blog right now, I’m pretty sure you are doing so because you are curious as to what is going on with my life these days and I thank you for that. Thank you for your curiosity and I hope you wish me well, too.
But this month, let me take you back to memory lane which is probably something I’m really good at.
I came to Japan in winter a year ago feeling oh-so-excited and scared of being in a foreign country. I started living in a share house, shared a room with people and cooked my own meals. I remember going to the kitchen when no one’s there because I wasn’t comfortable eating or cooking while people are around.
I started missing my family a lot when I realized the number of important events that I missed back at home – my niece’s birthday, my grandfather’s funeral and a wedding of a close friend and the list goes on.
I fought homesickness by doing stuff that I’ve always wanted to do, but never had the guts to do so. Huge thanks to the people around me for the much-needed push and inspiration.
My second hike led me to Mt. Fuji. I flew on top of the beach in Kujukuri. I fed a deer in Nara. I faced my fear in Fuji-Q. I visited the Ghibli Museum in Mitaka. I spent my first autumn in Kyoto by myself. I went snowboarding in Naeba. I spent one beautiful night at Yoyogi in spring.I celebrated two consecutive birthdays in Takao with no one else with me, but myself. I hiked around Aokigahara. I have fallen in love with Shimokitazawa. I’ve been to great hot springs and public baths. I joined Summer Sonic. I was able to go to Thailand and met my elephants!
If I stayed home, would I ever talk about these things to you today? You know, the answer is obvious. There’s no need to mention anything.
So, I guess we’re done reviewing the horrors, I mean the beauty of the year and a half that passed. By the time you’ll be reading this, I am already a new person. Nah, I’m kidding. I’ll be living in a new house, with new housemates, with a new train station to go to and a new office to work in. Everything is squeaky clean and new. And yes, it’s scary. How will I adapt? How will I fare in this new setup that I gladly accepted – with not just a tinge of fear, but heaps of it!
But after all this, know that I am still repeating what a friend once told me in my head.
“If it scares you, then go for it.”
It’s the aftermath that’s scary, I guess. All the what-ifs. All the questions in my head. But there’s no answer if I would not try it, no moving forward if I just keep on asking questions. The answer will only reveal itself when I’m there. And I’m here. I’m striving. I’ll let you know. Yes, you’ll know, pretty soon.
Peace and Love,
|〒150-0002 東京都渋谷区渋谷3丁目15-3 土屋ビル8F|